


the worst impressions

by sandpapersnowman



Series: Janey Springs' Emporium o' Fics [6]
Category: Borderlands (Video Games)
Genre: Dialogue Heavy, Gen, Multi, Short, Slut Shaming, zane gets roasted: the fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-14
Updated: 2019-09-14
Packaged: 2020-10-18 03:28:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20632334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandpapersnowman/pseuds/sandpapersnowman
Summary: “Amara the Siren,” Amara introduces herself, with a two-fingered wave. “Moze the Gunner, FL4K the Beastmaster,” she continues, pointing down the line of them, “and Zane, the himbo.”“Hey."





	the worst impressions

**Author's Note:**

> sometimes u get an intrusive thought mid-fight and u have to stop and write it!
> 
> i havent actually met tannis on sanctuary 3 yet but i needed an excuse for amara to introduce zane as a himbo lmao
> 
> title bastardized from the wombats' [Valentine](https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/wombats/valentine.html%22)

Tannis brushes some of the viscera off her pants, droplets joining the puddle forming where she stands.

“So! Who is everyone?” she asks.

“Amara the Siren,” Amara introduces herself, with a two-fingered wave. “Moze the Gunner, FL4K the Beastmaster,” she continues, pointing down the line of them, “and Zane, the himbo.”

“Hey,” he yelps, leaning forward to look past FL4K and Moze. “I’m not a -- whatever you just said. What the hell’s a ‘himbo’?”

A tinny laugh comes from somewhere, and Lilith’s picture pops up on his Clear Plastic Cherry ECHO.

“It’s the same as ‘bimbo’, but for guys,” Lilith chimes in. “Also, she’s right.”

“Right?” Amara replies, tilting her Classic Throwback ECHO up to laugh with her. “Every person we’ve seen that wasn’t a grunt, he’s had to make some comment about ‘aw, he didn’t seem that bad!’”

“‘She’s my kind of girl!’,” Lilith mimics in a terrible, almost offensive Irish accent.

“I don’t sound like that.”

Zane pouts at Moze and FL4K, silently begging one of them to come to his defense. Moze shrugs.

FL4K gives in and sighs.

“Alright,” they say, holding up a hand. “Be nice.”

“_Thank you_.”

“He hasn’t hit on me or Claptrap yet, so at least he has his limits,” they finish, curling the same hand thoughtfully under their eye.

“_Hey._”

“Hm,” Tannis hums _loudly_. “Sounds _very_ interesting, but let’s get back to the important things, shall we? The Vault map?”

Amara flicks him in the forehead when she steps toward Tannis, but Zane still gives her a smug look as though the rest of them didn’t just agree they think he’s some kind of slut.

… … … 

Amara gets a text message from Ellie a few minutes later.

_lilith told me abt the zane conversation lol_

_u right_

**Author's Note:**

> it is with a heavy heart and a cool gun that i must announce my return to borderlands fandom. Hello Again, Fuckers, Let's Do This


End file.
